yesterday I broke my heart.....

sorry for the dramatic title!

it all started when I went to sleep two nights ago. Several things happened and I realized I just felt broken-hearted. Like I could imagine having a broken heart. I felt it in the night and the next morning when I got up I accidently broke one of the hearts hanging on my fireplace.

I needed to heal my broken heart and I realized that this day (yesterday) I needed to do exactly what was right for me. So apart from making food and walking the dog, I spent the whole day curled up on the couch. A blanket, a furry hot water bottle hugged close and christmas carols playing over and over all day.

maybe the magic of a twinkling christmas tree was needed at last. It's not a real fir tree, it's a real woollies christmas tree and it does surprisingly have it's own christmassy smell!

I spent the whole day away from technology. I tried to watch tv but the chat didn't fit in.
I let the carols wash over me in a way they never have before. I may have read the tv times but honestly didn't get any further than the snowman picture! There was some crochet and looking at books later in the day reminding me who else I am.

I just stayed very quiet and steadied.......

and found some new ground........
it was like being drunk on christmas,
just sinking in the depths of it.

by the evening it was clear that the christmas fairy hadn't just been drinking tea.......


I'm glad the world didn't end yesterday, as some said it would. I have never believed that it would but I do believe we will begin to change the way we look at the world and each other.

I don't think there is any place for blame or accusation in this world anymore. We have all been part of the problem and we will all be part of the solution. There can't be any separation, we all need each other and we are all most definitely in this together! 

So I wish you a happy winter solstice tonight. I hope you can follow your inner compass to a place that feels most right to you and wish for good things to come,


  1. I dont think you're alone with these feelings.
    I have had many days on the sofa with my hot water bottle. Sometimes we get caught up on 'making Christmas' instead of living it.
    I say forget the pressure to have the perfect Christmas, just enjoy what you have, and if all else fails there's always...ELF xx

  2. Oh ps it's today that the end is nigh!!LOL

  3. Sometimes we just need a sofa and hot water bottle day! Step out from all the madness!
    Wishing you a lovely, peaceful, joyful Christmas Heather! Thank you for all the support you've given me since I started my little blog! :) x

  4. We all need duvet days sometimes - I hope your heart is feeling mended and you have had a bright Solstice. xx

  5. I hope you are feeling less heart broken today?
    Being kind and gentle to yourself is very good for your heart...

    bestest to you and yours

    Ps I am also sending rather large cheery smiles and giggles your way and some of these......xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  6. I hope you feel better now? I think it's good, if you can, to take some time out from the craziness of life and have a day of peace and solitude. It sounds like it did you the world of good. x

  7. Sometimes being quiet and away from all the chatter is the best thing - hope you're feeling better. Have a wonderful Christmas x

  8. I am having a blissful bit of me time at this moment. A Christmas Carol on the tv. Bowl of chips at my side. And a gin crantini, my Christmas tipple of choice. Laptop relocated so I can lurk or converse, as the mood strikes. It is probably the quietest couple of hours I am having in five days.
    Merry Christmas, Heather.

  9. Oh Heather, I feel the same - it is sometimes as if Christmas is happening to other people, but not me! I totally understand. Today has been very strange for me and I'm glad to know that I'm not alone.
    Liz @ Shortbread & Ginger

  10. thank you all for your lovely warm comments, wishing you much peace and light, Heather xxx

  11. Merry Christmas Heather! You have a lovely tree... I adore your books... I love books! And how could the Mayans possibly have known the world would end?? Rubish! I wish we did live in a world of no blame! That would be nice xx

  12. Take care and have some time out for yourself ... sometimes we all need a duvet day ... hope you are feeling much better now ... Bee xx

  13. I think we all need a duvet day from time to time, and it sounds as if yours has certainly restored your equilibrium.

    Look after yourself, won't you, and have a wonderful Christmas x

  14. I completely understand where you're coming from. I, too, felt completely broken-hearted for the past two weeks. It was just one thing after another, relentless. The important thing, I found, in addition to taking care of myself, was reaching out to friends. We were never meant to live in isolation, as we do in this day and age. It's important to ask for help when we need it.

    There's still a lot more good than bad in the world. It just doesn't make good news stories. We can't keep random, senseless tragedies from happening, but we can do much to brighten the world on a daily basis.

    I feel like I've just woken up and realized it's almost Christmas. I hope you feel the same way!

  15. Hi Heather
    Take good care of yourself, be gentle and I wish you a beautiful Christmas. Hugs, Trudy x